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Monday, 17th March 2025
Ah, the humble avocado. The beloved fruit (yes, it’s a fruit—please don’t call it a vegetable) of millennials, fitness gurus, and brunch enthusiasts everywhere. It’s green, it’s creamy, it’s Instagrammable, and it’s packed with “good fats.” What’s not to love?
Well, dear reader, your beloved avocado is not the innocent little superfood you think it is. In fact, your organic, fair-trade, responsibly-sourced (read: overpriced) avocado is slowly strangling the planet. You didn’t really think you were saving the world by spending £12 on avocado toast, did you?
You know how you’ve been guilted into taking shorter showers to save water? Well, I have some bad news. While you’re standing in your bathroom, turning off the tap between shampoo and conditioner, each avocado is guzzling about 320 litres of water just to reach your plate.
For context, that’s more than three entire bathtubs of water—for one measly avocado. Multiply that by the millions of avocados consumed every day, and suddenly, your “clean eating” doesn’t seem so clean anymore.
And let’s talk about Mexico, the world’s largest avocado producer. In Michoacán (the avocado capital of the world), water resources are being depleted so aggressively that rivers are drying up and local communities are struggling to find enough water to drink. So while you sip your artisanal oat milk latte, entire towns are wondering where their next glass of water is coming from. Cute, right?
What’s worse than an avocado with a massive carbon footprint? An avocado that also destroys forests.
To meet the ever-growing demand for guacamole and wellness influencer recipes, farmers are illegally cutting down forests to make space for avocado orchards. In places like Mexico and Chile, vast swathes of forest are being burned or bulldozed so more avocados can be grown for export.
Oh, and here’s the fun part: deforestation means fewer trees to absorb carbon dioxide, which means climate change gets worse. Congratulations, your avocado toast just made global warming worse. I hope it was worth it.
Didn’t expect crime syndicates to make an appearance in this story, did you? Surprise!
In Mexico, the global demand for avocados has attracted drug cartels looking to cash in on the “green gold” industry. Farmers are forced to pay extortion fees (aka “avocado taxes”) to cartels just to stay in business. Those who refuse? Well, let’s just say it doesn’t end well.
So next time you’re slicing open a perfectly ripe avocado, maybe take a second to wonder if that fruit was grown in a region controlled by violent criminals. Nothing says “superfood” like a side of organised crime.
You know how everyone loves to blame cows for climate change? Turns out, avocados aren’t much better.
Since most avocados are grown in Latin America and exported all over the world, they have to be shipped thousands of miles before they land in your eco-friendly, reusable tote bag. And since they’re delicate little things, they’re often transported by airplane, not just by boat or truck.
So while you’re feeling smug about skipping red meat, your avocados are racking up frequent flyer miles and belching out carbon emissions at every stage of their journey.
Look, I’m not here to tell you to quit avocados cold turkey. I get it. They’re delicious, they make great guacamole, and they somehow make any sandwich 10 times better. But maybe—just maybe—it’s time to stop pretending that your avocado obsession is saving the planet.
If you still want to eat avocados but feel slightly less guilty about it, here are some suggestions:
✔️ Buy local if possible (if you live somewhere that grows avocados sustainably, go for it)
✔️ Eat them less often (maybe don’t put them on every single meal)
✔️ Try alternative spreads (hummus is right there, guys)
✔️ Support ethical brands that source avocados responsibly
At the end of the day, your avocado toast isn’t a crime against humanity… but it’s also not the eco-friendly superfood you thought it was. So next time you sit down to brunch, just remember: that little green fruit is thirstier than you after a night out, and it’s literally costing the earth.